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As magical as weddings appear to be, there is much planning and organization behind this celebration of love and the beginning of a lifelong commitment for the newlyweds. But there is also much confusion surrounding the event, whether it’s appropriate to do this or that, and other questions for both the bride and groom and those invited to partake in the special occasion.
If you’re the happy couple tying the knot, here are five important wedding etiquette reminders:
1. Let your VIPs know first.
We know you’re giddy and itching to post a photo of your new bling, an exquisite ring that features a diamond in the colour of fancy green blue. But hold your horses and put off any social media posts until you have made the announcement to your personal VIPs. Give your parents a call, talk to your siblings, and let grandma know of the good news over the phone. Once all your family and friends have been informed, then go ahead and post that ring selfie.
2. Don’t invite someone to your pre-wedding party if you won’t invite them to your wedding.
This should be a no-brainer. If you have no intentions of inviting the person to your wedding, don’t make them expect that they will get an invite to the big day because they were invited to the pre-wedding events. Should this be overlooked, it will be an awkward conversation between you and a hurt friend/acquaintance.
3. Don’t include registry information on your invitations.
Wedding invitations are a way to inform your guests that you want them to witness your vows, not because you want their gifts. While it would be easy to include the URL for your registry, such as https://www.diamonds.co.nz/, on the invitations as it may create a negative impression on the guest. A better way to do this is by asking your family and friends to inform guests about your registry. Also, if you have a wedding website, you can post everything there, including a link that directs guests to the registry site for easy shopping.
4. Send thank-you notes.
As soon as you can, write those thank-you notes and send them out. Don’t wait a year or so to let your guests know how grateful you are that they have shared in your joy and for the gifts they have given. Have a running list of who sent you what, so the thank-you notes you send are more personal. Send these out before you forget, and they become irrelevant.
5. Take care of your wedding vendors.
Feed your wedding vendors, they will be working hard all day. From the wedding planner to the DJ, make sure your caterer knows that they will also be supplied with meals.
If you’re attending, you may also benefit from these no-nonsense wedding guest etiquette advices:
- Respect the RSVP.
It is common courtesy to always send back your RSVP card in a timely manner. Don’t make the couple guess whether you are coming or not, as missing RSVPs can be problematic when planning for certain wedding details such as meals and souvenirs.
- Don’t bring your own guests to the wedding.
If you don’t have a plus one indicated on the wedding invite, don’t bring one. While you might want a date to bring along, this is not your event and the burden of accommodating your guest falls on the newlyweds. Neither should you bring your kids along if the bride and groom have not expressly mentioned that they are invited to the wedding, especially to the reception which can possibly be an adult-only affair.
A millenial mom (of two boys) who has passion in makeup and motherhood in between.